‘Trendy’ is definitely not a word that one would use to describe me.
I thumb my nose at puffy skirts, oversized sunglasses and lap dogs. Coloured denim, boho dresses, chunky wedges, and those ridiculous shrunken mini-jackets simply do not feature in my wardrobe. I think that What’s Hot and What’s Not lists are not a barometer of feminine style, but simply subsidised by the fashion industry to encourage women to spend more money on clothes, shoes and handbags.
I’m not sure what other descriptors are out there to label women besides ‘trendy’, but I’m sure I fall into one of those other categories. I think that I probably dress in what some would describe as a ‘conservative’ style. I would prefer to use the word ‘classic’ – as I like to buy things that won’t go out of style in two months – but then this may invoke images of Audrey Hepburn and that simply would be misleading!
In actual fact, I would probably be more accurately described as a ‘comfort dresser’. I prefer flat shoes to high heels, I’m most comfortable in jeans and a t-shirt, and I’d rather spend an extra 20 minutes in bed than doing my hair and putting on my face. I don’t even mind wearing a suit to work because then you only need to spend two seconds figuring out which shirt or top to wear, rather than having to spend half an hour putting together an entire outfit.
But today, I finally succumbed to one of those fashion trends. Skinny jeans! I know that I’m only 12 months behind the crest of the trend, but judging by the number of women still walking around London in skinny jeans and boots it doesn’t seem to be a trend that is going to die too soon. I, for one, never thought that I would ever buy skinny jeans because I simply don’t have the legs for it. Skinny jeans only look really good on stick-thin women (note that I said women) with pins like Elle MacPherson, the only caveat being that if you have absolutely no arse then you look like a pre-pubescent boy.
After decades of bootcut jeans however, I am finally willing to show off my ‘womanly’ thighs and arse to the general public. I’m not certain yet whether I will be able to sit down or bend over, or even whether I will be able to continue my non-salad diet, but at least I’ll take comfort in elevating myself out of the ‘daggy dresser’ category for a little while.
And my arse looks good!
It’s not so bad being trendy
Everyone who looks like me is my friend
Please don’t hate me because I’m trendy
They’re not gonna laugh at me again
- Reel Big Fish